Why This Woman Says Her Career Choice Keeps Scaring Away Potential Partners — And What Experts Think
For many people, a career is more than just a way to earn money — it can influence social life, shape relationships, and even determine how others see you. For 27-year-old Amanda Sommer from Hartlepool, England, her professional path has brought her both financial success and unexpected challenges in her personal life.
Amanda’s story begins with a dream job that many might envy — working as a flight attendant for a major European airline. She loved the travel, the excitement, and the variety of people she met. But a major life decision set her on a new path that, while financially rewarding, has created barriers in her search for a lasting relationship.
Life Before the Change
Amanda had always been passionate about travel. After finishing her studies, she joined Ryanair as a cabin crew member. For several years, she flew across Europe, experiencing new cultures and meeting people from all walks of life. The role was demanding — early mornings, long hours, and frequent nights away from home — but it also offered freedom, adventure, and a sense of independence.
“It was never boring,” Amanda recalled in an interview. “One week you could be in Italy, the next in Spain or Germany. You’d meet different passengers every day, and you’d work with colleagues who became like a second family.”
But the excitement of the job sometimes clashed with her personal life. Maintaining a relationship while constantly traveling was challenging. Amanda eventually decided to leave the airline industry to return home and spend more time with her boyfriend at the time.
A Search for Stability — and a Surprise Opportunity
When Amanda stepped away from her job, she relied on savings to cover her expenses. She expected to find a new role quickly, but the transition proved harder than she imagined. After a few months, she realized her funds were running low.
Around this time, Amanda heard about an online content-subscription platform where creators could share photos, videos, and other media with paying subscribers. The idea appealed to her because it could be done from home, set her own hours, and — she believed — remain discreet.
“I thought it would be a temporary way to make money until I found something else,” Amanda explained. “You can work from your phone, you don’t need to commute, and you’re in control of your schedule.”
Within weeks of starting, Amanda began earning amounts far beyond her expectations — at one point making the equivalent of nearly $18,000 USD in a single month.
The Financial Upside — and the First Signs of Trouble
Financially, the decision was a success. Amanda no longer worried about rent, bills, or daily expenses. She could save, treat herself, and even consider investments for the future. She also had more time for hobbies and for her dog, which she had always wanted.
But there was a downside she hadn’t predicted: her relationship began to strain.
Her boyfriend at the time discovered her new line of work and was uncomfortable with it. While Amanda viewed it purely as a business decision — a way to earn money without a traditional office job — her partner saw it differently.
“He said it was basically cheating,” Amanda said. “I didn’t agree. I wasn’t meeting people in person, and I didn’t even know what my subscribers looked like. For me, it was work.”
An Ultimatum and a Breakup
The disagreement came to a head when Amanda’s boyfriend gave her an ultimatum: either she quit the platform or the relationship would end. For Amanda, the choice was difficult but ultimately clear — her career, and the financial independence it brought, came first.
“I told him that I couldn’t give up my income,” she said. “It was paying all my bills and allowing me to live comfortably.”
They broke up shortly afterward.
A Pattern Emerges
Following that breakup, Amanda dated other men — but found herself in the same situation repeatedly. In each case, the relationship would seem promising until her career came up. Once they learned about her online work, the tone would shift, and eventually the relationship would end.
According to Amanda, the last three men she dated all ended things after discovering what she did for a living.
“Sometimes they got upset that I didn’t tell them right away,” she explained. “Other times, even if I was upfront, they’d still decide they weren’t comfortable with it.”
Amanda’s Perspective
Amanda believes much of the reaction stems from societal attitudes toward unconventional careers — especially ones that involve online attention from strangers.
“It’s controversial, and some men feel jealous,” she said. “In some cases, I think it’s also because I earn more than them, and that can create tension.”
She admits the work has left her feeling “closed off” from broader society. Since she works from home, she doesn’t meet colleagues in person or have the daily social interactions that come with a traditional workplace. The isolation has sometimes led to feelings of loneliness.
“I’ve worked hard for over a year, but I haven’t really enjoyed the money in a social way,” Amanda said. “I’d love to find someone adventurous who enjoys traveling and going out, but it’s been difficult.”
Expert Opinions
To better understand Amanda’s experience, we spoke with relationship and career experts who offered insight into why her dating life might be affected.
Dr. Helen Murray, a psychologist specializing in relationships, notes that transparency is crucial in dating.
“Any career that carries a social stigma — fair or not — can cause tension in relationships,” Dr. Murray explained. “If someone learns about it later rather than from the start, they may feel misled, which damages trust.”
She also points out that societal attitudes often evolve more slowly than technology or industry trends.
“While online platforms have created new income opportunities, traditional beliefs about relationships and exclusivity still influence how people react,” she said.
James Redding, a career coach, adds that income differences can play a role as well.
“In some cases, a partner may feel insecure if the other person earns significantly more,” Redding said. “It can challenge traditional dynamics, especially if there are already feelings of discomfort about the type of work being done.”
Broader Societal Attitudes
Amanda’s story touches on a larger conversation about how unconventional jobs affect dating and relationships. Surveys have shown that while younger generations are more open to diverse career paths, stigma still exists around certain industries.
Cultural expectations, personal values, and social perceptions all factor into how people respond to a partner’s profession. Some individuals place high importance on the nature of their partner’s work, while others care more about trust, communication, and shared goals.
Looking Ahead
Despite the setbacks in her dating life, Amanda remains optimistic. She hopes to meet someone “the old-fashioned way” — in person, through shared activities or social circles — rather than online. She has no interest in dating someone she meets through her platform.
“I want a real connection,” she said. “Someone who understands me and supports my independence.”
In the meantime, she continues to focus on her business, her personal well-being, and her future plans. She dreams of traveling again, this time not for work but for leisure — and ideally with a partner who shares her adventurous spirit.
A Balancing Act Between Career and Connection
Amanda’s experience highlights the delicate balance between career choices and personal relationships. For some, financial independence and self-direction outweigh societal opinions. For others, alignment in values and lifestyle takes priority.
Whether her future holds a partner who accepts her career or a new professional chapter altogether, Amanda’s story serves as a reminder of the complex ways work and love intersect in today’s world.
